I spent most of this past weekend on Facebook, messaging relatives, telling my story and reading about theirs. It has been so overwhelming and intense and exhausting.
I spent hours chatting with my Uncle Bryan, who is my father's younger brother. He was able to fill me in on the family tree and some of the dynamics of the family. Trying to keep names straight and relations is mind boggling in a family of this size. He also shared a few memories of my mom, which always makes me smile. She is a beautiful, terrific woman!
My next message started this way....."Hey Sis"...Nick Kaplan is my brother. Nick is 31 or 32 and lives in Arkansas. He grew up with the BF and has a relationship with him. Looking at the pictures of him, I think he looks the most like me...but not really like me.
The following day, I got a message from Leigha, my sister. Nick and Leigha are "whole" siblings. Leigha is the youngest at 29 and still lives close to BF. I have been able to see some pictures of BF on her facebook page. Strange....he looks like a normal guy...not the man I had imagined him to be.
Last but certainly not least I heard from JD. JD lives in Phoenix and like me has never had a relationship with BF. JD is 35, which leads me to believe that there was some hanky panky going on with the BF back in the day - Considering BF left when I was (at the youngest) 1. JD has a lot of the same feelings about BF as I do. He has talked to him and met him, but nothing more than that.
We have planned to all meet in March of 2014. It's a ways off, but I am still excited to meet all my new family and for them to meet each other. Nick and Leigha have never meet JD either.
I have yet to talk to BF and that's ok. I am in no hurry. This journey may have begun with the curiosity to know him, but it's not about that anymore. Now I am more interested in knowing my siblings. He is a man who provided a seed but nothing more than that in my life. Eventually I am sure that the day will come when I will face him but until that day comes, I really have no interest.
I have lived 37 years without him, I certainly don't need his presence in my life now.
Until Next time....
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